So umm me and my mom were coming home from somewhere tonight and idk what caused it but I started thinking about high school and growing up and stuff. The main thoughts were about my friends or I should say so called friends.
I guess maybe I should start by sourting out the main groups of so called friends I had growing up and in high school.
First off there mwas a certain group of friends I had growing up. And as far as I remember we went to school toghter all of our lives.
Then there was a group that i knew all through out high school cause I joined when I was a freshmen it was the academic team.
Then finally there was a group that i was in for only about 2 1/2 years of high school called fccla.
So now I remember what caused these thoughts I was somewhere and saw someone from the fccla that me and my mom both knew. We both looked her right in the face and she never even spoke to us.
And me and my thought that was weird because she had been my best friend throughout those years in fccla.
So it got me to thinking why would someone like that just not talk to me?
Then I thought about two friends from the group I grew up up with , there was one I rmebered very well I grew up with her all my life from the first bbtist church preschool all the way through high school. How long was that 16 years at least. And well she has been ignoring me also.
At this point I was very frustrated cause it was like well if u cznt trust a friend u had that long and they aren't really ur friend or weren't I meant to say then how will I make any new friends where i live?
And then as I get home it hits me another supposed best friend of mine had also stopped talking to me and has been ignoring me for a while.
And then that's when the pieces feel in place.
Cause you see the won I had known for 16 years and the one that was another supposed best friend of mine had recently become best friends. And they both started ignoring me right around the same time. And then I get to thinking well no one from this group of friends I grew up with really talks to me anymore. Uh huh do u get where I'm going with this? It was that simple it had to been Ingroup/out group mentality was the reason why no one in that group of friends was talking to me anymore.
So I examine the fccla group. Remember that girl I saw earlier tonight and mentioned in the start of this blog. Well it had hit me that once she stopped talking to me everyone I was in fccla with did. Uh huh another case of I group/out group mentality.
So then I realized hey the reason I have basically no friends where i live is because of the ingroup/out group way of thinking.
Now I had to try to figure out what got me kicked out of those groups? Well I'm sure and I'm sry I always say this alot I'm sure the fact that i have recnetrly within the last couple of years came out as an athiest didn't help. So lets examine the two main groups I've talked about.
Now the people I grew up with group well its harder to figure out. I mean maybe the fact that alot of them aren't single anymore didn't help matters. Contorllkng bfs/husband or at least ones that don't want them talking to me. But as far as the best friend who I didn't know for sixteen years but knew since middle school goes well this theory sounds farfetehced because I had been friends with her sweetheart and now husband for a long time. Of course he may i have changed. But that doesn't explain the girl I've know on for sixteen years turning her back on me. Unless either one it was a very good lie for sixteen years or two the middle school girl is now controlling her. I really don't know what it is.
Now lets exmain the fccla group. It could be the boyfriend issue all over again. Of course here is another theory maybe they just used me. Maybe since I was the only male in the group they felt they needed to use me until another one came around. Or maybe it was all a lie from the start I really dont know.
Anyway I those were the thoughts I had tonight. And thonking about those things is why I was and still am a lil down and am hurting a lil tonight.
Now here are the closing thoughts for this blog.
Number one the academic team I was on was the best group I was in cause I basically have a least three friends from that group on my life today.
Number two if u ever wanna tease me about how much I text or am online just rember I bascilly only have three friends left form growing up not counting mom and my family so well I wanna have more people to talk to and be friends with than just three people. Though they are high quality and loyal friends for outlasting people I've grew up with all my life.
Anyway I just felt the Need to write this thanks for reading If u do.
